Table Manners That Make You Think When You Know Their Origins

Table Manners: Eating with Hands

In 17th-century Western Europe, France saw significant cultural advancements during the reign of Louis XIV, also known as the Sun King. Under his rule, table manners were elevated as a means of reinforcing royal authority. At first glance, one might assume that modern French table manners originated during Louis XIV’s era.

 

However, a closer examination reveals that the use of modern utensils, such as forks and knives, would have seemed odd or even laughable at the time. Even Louis XIV himself, despite instituting strict dining etiquette, did not use a fork and instead picked up meat from his soup with his hands. Some of the dining rules he implemented included, "Do not suck your fingers after eating," and "Always use your right hand while dining." When compared to today’s refined French dining customs, such rules may seem almost childish.

 

The idea that eating luxurious French cuisine with bare hands was once considered proper etiquette is truly surprising. This begs the question: what about the origins of Korean table manners?

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No Talking During Meals

A popular comedy sketch titled "We Need to Talk" comes to mind. The sketch humorously portrayed the Korean custom of refraining from talking during meals. It depicted various humorous scenarios where communication breakdowns within a family led to chaos and laughter. One memorable scene featured a father shouting, “Let’s eat in silence!” only for the rest of the family to awkwardly resume eating in total quiet. While the father’s authority was emphasized, the unnatural silence created an amusing and relatable moment for viewers.

 

In traditional Korean table manners, staying silent while eating was considered a key virtue. The most plausible explanation for this practice is that it was meant to encourage quicker meals. In the past, Korean families often lived in small homes, making it impossible for everyone in a large family to eat at the same time. To accommodate everyone, some family members had to finish eating quickly so others could eat next. To ensure this process ran smoothly, refraining from conversation during meals became an essential custom.

 

In modern times, however, this practice has evolved. Families today are encouraged to engage in conversations during meals, as highlighted by the term "bapsangmeori gyoyuk" (mealtime education). Mealtime is now seen as an opportunity to strengthen the bond between parents and children. This shift in Korean table manners may have been influenced, in part, by Jewish traditions, which emphasize family discussions during meals. As this demonstrates, table manners across the world are subject to change over time.

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The Soup Bowl Goes on the Right

Many Koreans have heard their parents say, "Place the soup bowl on the right side of the table." But why is this considered proper table etiquette in Korea? The most common explanation is that since most people are right-handed, positioning the soup bowl on the right makes it easier to handle liquids without spilling. For left-handed individuals, it would naturally make sense to place the soup bowl on the left side.

 

However, cultural traditions often overrode practicality. For example, during traditional ancestral rituals, the soup bowl was placed to the left of the ancestral tablet. This led to the belief that placing the soup bowl on the left side during regular meals was inappropriate. Such practices reflect the influence of Confucian values during the Joseon Dynasty, which often neglected the needs of left-handed individuals.

 

Table manners evolve over time. They are both social rules
and customs meant to be observed by all members of a society.
However, their origins often reveal close ties to the lifestyles and values of the era
in which they emerged.
As times change and ways of life evolve, so too do table manners.
This raises an interesting question: what will table manners look like in the future?
It’s a thought worth pondering.

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